Before I get my running and pushing on, I have to amend the ending of the previous post. Not edit it, because I want the confusion to ring out. But I also want to register what I think it means, even if it’s artificial and maybe wrong, otherwise it’s not a real exercise in finding out what I’m thinking.
I think there is a part of me that is being horrible and saying fuck you, I want you. Being an ape. Uga Buga Me Want. A Terrible Seamstress. Here’s a woman trying to untangle and here I am have more thread. Pumping into her wheel. Adding thread to her daemon. I won’t do that anymore.
Where will my thread have a chance not to be evil. Cuz seamstressing is not an evil thing. My thread is not evil. When…
when her dragon is untangled into heaps of assorted thread. And mine won’t be in the pile. Maybe some poisonous phantom of mine. Because mine I’ll have kept. It will not be in the dragon. I’ll give her then. Only then.